Surprisingly, No Longings

Yesterday, my son and I returned from a week-long vacation at Walt Disney World. It was his first trip to Florida and the bigger of the two US Disney parks and the first time I'd been there in more than a decade. It was just he and I, and it rained nearly every day. But we didn't let that get us down. We pulled out the umbrella and kept soldiering on. The people watching (especially with the added stressor of bad weather) was fantastic. I saw good parenting, not good parenting, a lot of really large people, and a couple of amazing mullets. What a trip!

The last time I was at WDW, it was with the first "love of my life," and I was sick as a dog (found out while there that I was pregnant). I still have some good memories of that vacation and still harbor feelings for that man, although we haven't spoken in 12 years. In addition to that, it was only a month ago that DW ended our relationship. Going to not only a family-friendly destination but one where many lovebirds find themselves, I was thinking I would feel a bunch of romantic longings while there, either for Love #1 or DW. As it turns out, I longed for neither of them.

Instead of spending my time in the "happiest place on earth" thinking about lost loves, I thought about my true love, my son. We had excellent quality time together, we drove each other crazy, and we played — just as children and parents should. Sure, it might have been fun to have a great man with us (and possibly his children), but nothing felt like it was missing during this vacation.

Because there were only two of us in WDW, we found places to sit at restaurants easier, we were able to have more room in the rides, and we maneuvered through the crowds easily. We huddled under our umbrella and didn't have as many personalities and wants to take care of. It was easy and carefree.

Even as I return to the "real world," I don't find myself longing for these men — or any men, for that matter. I am reenergized about work, I am excited about the summer, and I am happy. A friend texted me today to ask if I was having any luck finding someone or if there was any hope of rekindling anything with DW. I answered that I'm not looking, and I am over DW. That ship has sailed, and I am very happy right now sitting on the harbor with my son, watching the other ships take off.