Thursday, October 10, 2013

Let's Cut to the Chase

I don't like dating. I'm not good at it, and very little about the idea of "trying on" different men does anything for me. Sure, some people enjoy the getting-to-know you stage, the first kisses, the awkwardness ... but I like things to be known, comfortable, and simple. I think this may be part of the reason dating doesn't work too well for me.

Men seem to like the chase. There have been books written on the subject of this dating game and what we're supposed to do when. I, on the other hand, just want to be caught. No chasing required. If I'm interested in a man, I'm his. And I'm loyal. Once I've made up my mind, I'm not looking around any longer. I'm more than happy to take myself off the market. This freaks out men because they feel I'm rushing into something or pushing them.

Although all of us probably have some codependency issues, I honestly believe my desire to skip all of the formalities and just get into a relationship isn't about that. It's about knowing what's next. As I've mentioned before in this blog, I am a high I/D in the DISC assessment: I like to have fun, but I also like to get down to business. And relationships work exactly the same way for me.

So while I enjoy going out and having fun (i.e., dating), I can skip over all of that awkward craziness that happens during the beginning dating stages. I just want to be in a relationship. I'll work to keep it solid and loving once it's established, but can't I just jump there from the get-go? I mean, if we realized pretty soon that it was a fit, let's just "play house" and see where it goes. I'm not going to move in with you tomorrow, but some certainty would make me pretty happy.